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Saturday, October 14, 2006

-- Opened --

#-Up for Grabs

I think I'm really stupid, or cowardly. In the last month or so, I've missed 2 very good opportunities. Remember the hot lady I met at Fiesta? She gave me her number 3 weeks ago, but since I was so busy I didn't get round to calling her to ask her out until this week, and she was busy. Can't help but think that if I had called within the week she had given me her number she would've at least wanted to go out with me. I mean I do want to get to know her, but it looks like maybe I'll have to ask again another time.

And then last night I met another beautiful lady at social at Esplanade. I could tell she had some interest in me, but I didn't even get round to introducing myself because either I was dancing with someone else, or she wasn't around. And the worse part was that after the event ended she hung around and STILL I didn't even introduce myself. Feels so sad case. Rather upset with myself actually, for being such a wimp. I don't even know what prevented me from introducing myself, I mean I do it all the time, but somehow she disappeared too quickly for me to do it.

Makes me wonder if I even mean a thing if you can't even remember to tell me where you're going. If I asked you a few days before and you forgot about it, then fine. But I asked you to tell me where you were going on the day itself; yesterday. I'm not angry that I don't mean a thing to you, but I'm pissed because you can't even remember such a simple thing, or perhaps chose not to remember to do it. You've already demonstrated how small a part of your life I am, and I'm not even very upset about that. But isn't it just simple responsibility and consideration to answer a question that I asked? How difficult is it to just SMS me, "hey im going to jitterbugs for social tonight", or "i ll b joining my shifu so i wont be joining u"? Now there's a big part of me that just screams out "FORGET YOU!" but I just can't bring myself to do it. Like it or not, you've become a friend to me already. And I daresay I've been very kind, even at your worst. Soon, I might not be able to take it anymore.

So many things to upset me. Maybe I should go back to filling up my schedule so tight that I won't even be able to allow time for being interested in anyone, so that I can't be upset. Well it's going to happen. Next week, all my weekdays are filled, with Merengue on Monday, Cuban on Tuesday, Driving on Wednesday, Swing on Thursday and Salsa on Friday. Not to mention Salsa and Swing this Saturday as well, and Thompson on Sunday. I know it's unhealthy but I can't give myself too much time to think. There are too many things I want to do and so little time. Anyway, this is not the time to think about relationships either. If I go away for 6++ years, it'll be a very trying time and although it's nice to have someone at home waiting for you, it's also rather selfish to put anyone through that if you don't even feel strongly that you can marry this person. As such, as my dancing and music improves, and I study medicine, I'm just going to say something:

"Eligible Bachelor UP FOR GRABS!!!"

haha.

-- Closed --

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